Hospital bedrest day 19: My quality of life has just improved

Early this morning at 6.00am, my MIL brought me a lovely gift - a mini fridge!  We were taking about it for a while but I never did think that we would actually be allowed to bring one it, but my MIL asked the nurses and they okay-ed it!

It's so wonderful to be able to access my milk and yogurt at any time without worrying about bothering the nurses (previously these were kept in the fridge in the nurses' room).  What a luxury :)

They've also changed my bed.  My former bed had elevated railings so you can imagine how uncomfortable it is to sit at the side of the bed with my legs raised above my huge belly!  The new bed has railings that can be pushed down  lower than the mattress so I can sit at the side of the bed without getting my legs numb. 

Finally, my MIL also brought an extension cord so now I do not need to walk around my bed to plug and unplug my laptop and mobile phone charger!

At this stage, I'm past the stage of being depressed about being stuck here in the hospital when I still think it is not a medical necessity (and psychologically damaging!), but I do get bouts of feeling blue during the day.  I'm just wishing that the days will go pass quickly but it just seems so slow!

Hospital bedrest day 15: The cervix is doing okay!

Can't believe that it has only been 2 weeks since I was sentenced to hospital bedrest....it seems like I've been here forever!  I marked my two week anniversary by throwing out my lunch whilst brushing my teeth, something that I used to do during my first trimester "all-day sickness".  Blame in on the lack of fresh air!

The highlight of my day was getting to see my FM Specialist (yup, the one who summoned me to this bedrest) and seeing that the babies were all doing well and are all growing within the normal range. 

Baby A is 538 grams
Baby B is 570 grams (no surprise, this one is a kicker!)
Baby C is 530 grams

And the cervix is doing okay at 3.5cm!

That's great news since it is every mother-to-be of multiples' nightmare for their cervix to shorten and this risk of preterm labor typically starts from the 20th week onwards.

Hospital bedrest day 13: I am part of a triplet mommies forum!

I spend my entire afternoon till night on www.forums.fertilitycommunity.com (due date buddies category) where there is a really active triplet mommies forum! I've finally logged in my profile and am feeling really good about being part of a support network for triplet mummies-to-be :)

MIL brought me cushions for the foldable lazy chair, generously loaned by FIL last week.  DH swears that the RM60 chair is the most value-for-money lazy chair and spends the first hour or two of his evening hospital visits snoozing on in!  Yet, whilst the lazy chair is more comfortable than my hospital bed which often tends to get too hot, it doesn't give me enough support as a chair whilst working on my laptop.  Now with the cushions, I've been able to sit up for hours working at my lap top for the first time since my hospital bed rest sentence. Hip hip hurray, no more body aches and shifting around uncomfortably!

Hospital Bedrest Day 9: 22 weeks pregnant & belly picture

Yay, I am another week's pregnant and am at 22 weeks!  You have no idea how every precious week counts for a mother pregnant with triplets!  Two more weeks to viability, i.e. 24 weeks I say to myself, but still deep within me I know that 24 weeks would still not be good enough for the triplets.

Yesterday I heard the tragic news from a houseman doctor that the other triplet mother, also on hospital bed rest since her week 20, also under The FM Specialist as me delivered her triplets at 24 weeks last Saturday.  I couldn't resist finding out more information, so today I asked the nurse from this triplet mother's ward and she confirmed that all three babies did not survive.  I don't have much details but I do remember The FM Specialist mentioning to me at our last scan a week ago that it was good that my cervix had not shortened, as this other triplet mother's cervix had started to shorten.

I tried to imagine what this poor mother must be going through right now, but I guess no one can really imagine her pain other than one who has gone through such an experience.  I told The Husband about it and he started feeling scared for us and our triplets.  Just a few days ago he had told me that he was feeling confident that I would be able to make it to 34 weeks, and I was like wow, what a big thing for a typically pessimistic, worst-case-scenario type of guy that I know my husband to be!

DH and I continue to experience mixed feelings of anticipation and apprehension.  I now feel my babies distinctively kicking in my womb.  How can a mother-to-be not help but have love for her unborn babies even when she knows that they might not make it or that they may have lifelong disabilities?  How can parents-to-be of triplets not start dreaming about life with the triplets and all the excitement it can bring?

Right now all we can do is to continue to pray and hope for the best, as each slow day crawls by.

Hospital Bedrest Day 7: Thump, thump, thump!

One thing I really like about being on hospital bed rest is that I get to hear my triplets' heartbeats three times a day.  This is very assuring for an anxious mother like me!  Just the day before I was admitted we were on the way to church and I was in tears as I told The Husband that perhaps the babies had died because I could not feel them kick and my tummy felt really hard.  Being first-time parents-to-be what more parents-to-be of triplets, we had no idea how hard or soft my tummy should feel.  fetal heart rate monitor done at 6.00am this morning. 

The fetal heart rate monitoring looks something like this except the machine that they have is really ancient and bulky!

It was another unproductive day.  I ate my breakfast, slept, woke up for lunch, and then slept again.  Then woke up again feeling really groggy and lousy.  "I'm physically and psychologically deteriorating in here," I told myself.  I started feeling angry towards The FM Specialist for putting me on hospital bed rest for the next four months.  How would he know how this feels like? I fumed.  I harboured thoughts taking an AOR (At Own Risk) outing to the mall for an afternoon.

The room got really noisy with the hoards of family members and visitors that my room mates received.  The clock ticked slowly as I waited for my visitors, misery sweeping over me once again.

Finally, The Husband came at about 5 plus in the evening, and mum and dad arrived not long after that.  My mood elevated with their long visit, yet always a little sad when it's time for The Husband to leave.

Another unproductive day, sigh!  Lots of urgent tasks on my "to do" list left undone.  When time is not the issue, mood is.  Hope I'll get to practise mind over mood tomorrow then!

Hospital bedrest Day 2: A depressing day which ends being upgraded!

The weather was hot today and I spent a very miserable day in the 3rd class ward.  The beds are so closed to each another than during visitation hours, my neighbors' visitors would repeatedly knock on my bed.  Some even had the decency to lean against the railing of my bed!

It got so hot in the afternoon that the only thing I could do was to lie sweating on my bed trying to fall asleep.  Yet with kids running up and down the ward and tons of people walking around and banging on my bed, sleep wasn't easy.

Finally at the end of an awful day, I was informed that there was an available bed in the 1st class ward!  I'm now in a four-bedded room at the 1st class ward which is a huge improvement!  It's so much quieter in here and I actually have quite a lot of cabinet space and sitting space for my visitors.  Best of all, I don't have to be paranoid about hiding my mobile phone and lab top every time I go to the loo (which is about every 2 hours or so).

And air-conditioning!!!  I was never and air-cond person (or even really a fan-person) before this, but try being pregnant with triplets and being in this hot Malaysian humid heat.

Hospital bedrest Day 1: Sentenced at 21 weeks pregnant

Hello blogworld!

Today marks the beginning of my journey on hospital bed rest until the delivery of my triplets.of which the end I do not know.

At 21 weeks pregnant with triplets, my ultra careful and conservative Mr. MF Specialist has sentenced me to hospital bed rest.  Okay, he initially wanted me to be admitted at 20 weeks, but I requested for a week's delay at my own risk (AOR).

I have no current complications and I'm in here for observation.  I guess Mr. MF Specialist thinks that this is the safest place in the world for me and the triplets to be right now until the day they are due.

I do not know how this journey will end.  I am fully aware of the risks involved in my complicated pregnancy and the possibility that my babies may not make it or may not make it in good health.  For a mother-to-be of triplets, I can tell you that every passing uneventful day is another day to be thankful to the Lord.  We do not ever take anything for granted.

Since I live in a country (Malaysia) where heath care insurance typically does not include pregnancy benefits, having my triplets delivered and being provided with NICU care in a private hospital is not an option.  Moreover, due to the high risk of triplet pregnancy, most private obstetricians will not want to take me on as a patient.  So here am I, in a government hospital which will be my new home for the next few months.  Yet even unlimited access around my new home is not permitted; I'm restricted to my ward.

Mum and dad, The Husband, and my parent-in-laws came to settle me into my new jail.  First class was fully booked.  Second class was housed in the same ward as third class, with no significant differences, so we found the best located bed possible in third class.

Third class is a non-aircond, fan-only ward, with standard no-choice meals that I did no more than to glance at, and of course two common bathrooms shared by all the patients.  The ward can take up to 40 patients, and at the time of my admission there were about 20 patients.  There is a fierce lady guard sitting right in front of the door way who effectively prevents visitors from coming in after visiting hours and chases out visitors from the ward once visiting hours are over.  She's also responsible for ensuring patience do not venture out of the ward - no, I'm not even allowed to take 10 steps across the hall to the vending machine!

By the way, did I not mention that it costs RM3 per night in the third class ward?  That's less than US$1!